Your family will need specific documents and account details within days of your death, not weeks. Most veterans have that information scattered across a filing cabinet, a phone, and their own memory — none of which helps a spouse or adult child who is grieving and also trying to meet deadlines. A single end-of-life file fixes that: one place, one list, one person who knows where it is.
What Military Records Belong in the File?
Start with your DD-214. It's the single document a funeral home, the VA, and a national cemetery will all ask for first — it proves discharge status and determines eligibility for burial benefits, military funeral honors, and a government headstone or marker. If you can't find yours, you can request a replacement through the National Archives using Standard Form 180, or online through eVetRecs with an identity-verified account. The VA's own guidance on getting military service records explains both paths in detail — see va.gov: Get Military Service Records.
Also include: your separation orders if you have them, any VA disability claim or award letters, your VA claim number, and your pre-need burial eligibility determination if you've already filed one. None of these are required to have a funeral or a burial, but having them on hand shortens every phone call your family will make.
A note on timing: if you're the one requesting a replacement DD-214 for yourself, do it while you're healthy and have time to wait out the process. Families requesting records for a veteran who has already died go through a different, often slower channel — the National Cemetery Scheduling Office will try to locate records on its own, but that adds time to a process your family is already racing against.
What Financial and Property Documents Should Be Included?
This is the part people underestimate. A spouse who doesn't normally handle the bills can lose weeks just figuring out what accounts exist. The file should hold:
- Life insurance policies — SGLI, VGLI, or private final expense policies, with policy numbers and the insurer's contact information
- Bank and credit union account numbers, and which accounts are joint versus individual
- Property deeds, vehicle titles, and any mortgage or loan statements
- Social Security number and Medicare information
- A copy of your will, if you have one, and the executor's contact information
- Pension or retirement account statements (military retired pay, Social Security, any civilian pension)
If you're unsure whether a will even makes sense for your situation on a fixed income, it's worth working through that question separately before you decide what belongs in this section of the file.
What About Passwords and Other Digital Accounts?
Email accounts, online banking, and bill-pay logins are often the hardest things for a family to access after a death — companies don't hand over login credentials just because someone died. Keep a current list of account names and either the passwords themselves (in a sealed document, not a sticky note) or the master password to a password manager. Note which bills are on autopay, because those keep drafting from an account whether anyone is watching it or not.
Think through the accounts that rarely cross anyone's mind until they're needed: the email address tied to password resets for everything else, any cloud storage holding photos or financial records, social media accounts someone will need to memorialize or close, and streaming or subscription services that should be canceled rather than left running. A short, current list beats a detailed one that's two years out of date.
Where Do Funeral Wishes and Instructions Fit?
Your end-of-life file isn't the same as a letter of instruction, but it should contain one, or point clearly to where it's kept. A letter of instruction lays out your specific wishes — burial or cremation, service details, who to call first — in your own words, separate from the legal will. See What Is a Letter of Instruction and What Goes in It? for what belongs in that document specifically, and How to Write Down Your Funeral Wishes So Your Family Can Find Them for how to record preferences your family might otherwise have to guess at.
| Category | What to include |
|---|---|
| Military records | DD-214, VA claim number, pre-need eligibility determination |
| Financial | Bank accounts, life insurance policies, retirement statements |
| Property | Deeds, vehicle titles, loan documents |
| Legal | Will, power of attorney, executor contact info |
| Digital | Password list or password manager master key |
| Wishes | Letter of instruction, funeral and burial preferences |
| Contacts | Doctor, attorney, insurance agent, clergy if applicable |
What to Do About It
Building this file takes an afternoon, not a weekend. Use a physical folder or a labeled binder — digital backups are fine, but a death doesn't always come with easy access to your phone or laptop password, so a paper copy matters.
A few concrete steps:
- Pull your DD-214 and VA paperwork first. If you can't locate it, request a replacement now rather than leaving that task for your family under time pressure.
- List every account — financial, insurance, and digital — with account numbers and contact phone numbers.
- Write or update your letter of instruction so your wishes are in writing, not just in conversation.
- Tell at least one person, ideally your spouse or the person most likely to handle your affairs, exactly where the file is kept.
- Review it once a year, or after any major change — a new account, a paid-off loan, a new address.
None of this requires a lawyer or a financial planner to start. It requires sitting down once and writing things down where someone else can find them. If your spouse would also need to understand your overall financial picture beyond this file, How to Make Sure Your Spouse Isn't Left Guessing About Money covers that ground directly.
This is informational material, not legal or financial advice. For guidance specific to your estate, consult an attorney or financial professional licensed in your state.